Kit's Apartment
When they'd left the house the previous night, they hadn't thought about all the extra clothing they'd need to bring or much of anything if they were honest. All the youth had been thinking in fact was that they wanted to put as much distance between themself and the apartment as possible. As if Kit would have returned almost as soon as he'd left. As if he wasn't likely to stay out hours, maybe even houses after he came home to drop off his guitar. But their nerves had been frazzled, the former wick lost in a dreamy singing reverie with their own instrument clasped loosely where they half sat, half curled on the couch until their roommate came in.
He'd been a bit aloof and had gone out drinking they knew, a gentle inquiry having been made beforehand that had made them realise that there was nothing they could do for him, no comfort that they could provide. He'd been waspish, a sign that he was slipping into one of his melancholy moods and something that they had personally slipped into before as well so they had thought to leave him to his own mind for a bit, assuming that he might want to have a chance to think in peace; it was something they find they needed and it could help some. When he'd said he was going out, there had been a sense that the golly didn't want company and furthermore, he apparently wanted to keep it that way for quite some time; he'd explained that he'd be out late. Maybe it had stung a little, the seeming Bastian feeling inadequate and more than a little sorry for themself for being so useless; they'd wanted to be there for him as he had so often been there for them.
In the scheme of things, Shae came up short.
As such, it came as quite a shock when he came in, the realisation that he'd found company catching them entirely off-guard. The man had picked up a male lover, one who was yelling outside with the Bastian lilt and a cultured tone that was still evident despite his clear inebriation.
A galdor?
The teenager had been scared to ask, not wanting their suspicions to be true, not wanting any of their suspicions to be true because they didn't want to believe that they lacked something that the other could have provided and the sound of that voice was likely to unfurl a list of how poorly they measured up.
Delectable. If this man was delectable then... what were they?
Not that they were entirely sure what delectable meant but it seemed to be a good thing based on how Kit said it; they had an idea what it might mean given the context. And it hadn't mattered how affectionate he'd been with them... it wasn't them that he wanted.
He'd given a warning, something that had sent their heart nervously aflutter, raven-haired youth not wanting to be present for when himself and his lover - as that was what he would become - returned. They'd managed to remain a state of frozen surprise for a good minute or two after his departure and then they had sprung into panicked action. They'd all but ran to Delyth's, the temperatures and the frosty flakes that the morose sky spat at their petite form had hardly registered in their flight.
Why did they feel it so keenly now? Was it a fear of what they would find? A small heaviness of heart about returning to him as if they had done something bad and were now crawling back to him? They shouldn't encounter this lover of his, the late hour quite intentional. Surely by now, Kit would be alone. Surely by now, he might want them.
But what if he didn't? What if their company was still not enough for him? What if he wandered off again? They could only hope that he was open to them, that they could curl into the warmth of his embrace and have him banish the cold misery from body and soul. Their own inadequacies would melt away if he just held them, even if after the night he'd had, they might be something of a consolation prize. They didn't know but they did hope that he needed them and had missed them as much as Shae had missed him.
Which was odd really. Why had they missed him quite so much?
When they reached the door, the raen paused, cocking their head to the side to determine what could be heard from within. Was that music? Quietly, they twisted the handle and pushed their way inside, still listening intently, a soft puzzlement on their face. A new song? They hadn't heard the galdor work on composing a new song in... well... actually they didn't thing they had. A few creatively strummed chords or a hummed bar here and there didn't count as composition really but this...
They weren't sneaking, not really. The fact that Kit wasn't likely to hear them had nothing to do with any attempt at stealth on their part. They just wanted to hear him. They also didn't want to throw him off. It wasn't like they were trying to gain insight into him when he was unaware.
The music and the words drifted from the bedroom, the raen creeping - yes, okay, it was definitely creeping, okay? - towards it, wondering if he was alone and hoping that that was the case. The lyrics they could hear though... The former wick didn't feel warmed by his near presence but found themself more greatly chilled, the weight in their heart seeming to increase.
A Bastian? He was singing about... a Bastian. But it wasn't a simple description of one of those folks but a song that held romance to it. Oh, maybe he wouldn't admit that, he wasn't the sort who had inconvenient feelings after all, but it definitely had the tone of a love ballad to Shae's ears.
A Bastian lover.
From the doorway, they could see the state of the room, the bed, sights that their grey-blue gaze skittered over hastily, not wanting to settle and risk absorbing details while they sought the man himself. Arms wrapped around their torso as if seeking warmth, the youth took in his state of dress - or veritable lack thereof - and his attractively dishevelled hair as those long fingers moved over strings, caressing it seemed to their eyes, touching the guitar in a way that had sensuality to it. It was like the song he sang was bleeding outwards, the composition lending a passion and tenderness to his movements directly inspired by the subject. He held the instrument like the damn lover he appeared so keen to blather on about.
"Feeling inspired, are you?" they asked, an edge to the words that came from gritted teeth, a rictus that could almost pass as a grin if it wasn't for the rigidity, the lack of true warmth or friendliness behind it; their eyes were cold. Unbeknownst to them, the tremor in their insides translated to real movement, the female body trembling a little as they stood staring at him.
"Found someone to inspire your muse?" Shae questioned sardonically, the partial twist at one side of their mouth easily mistaken for a smirk although it was truly the beginning of a sneer; disdainful, hating and disgusted.
It was that delectable man from last night. He was singing about that man that he'd just met and would probably never see again. Or maybe he would, maybe they would become a thing! Apparently, he had plenty to offer, loads going for him if Kit was sitting here working away on music as if Shae had never even existed. What were they? A drain. A total waste of space. Sweet Lady...
"Did you miss me, Kit or did you not notice that I was gone? I mean... you've forgotten before that I was here so..."
Why were these words coming out of their mouth? Why couldn't they stop them? Why did they have that edge to them? Needling him and trying to find a weak spot to... what?
What did Shae even want?