[M | Closed] A Thread of Ivy

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Aurelie Steerpike
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Mon Nov 11, 2019 1:03 am

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Aurelie was not going to cry, even though her eyes from behind her hands were hot and she could feel the pressure building up. She just was not. It had been years since she had cried, and today was not going to be that day, just because someone didn't want to be her friend, or likely to have anything to do with her. Most people didn't want to be friends with her, and she didn't want to have anything to do with them either. It stood to reason that just because she wanted to--to be close to someone, that didn't mean it would go the other way.

I am not so kind, she thought desperately. If she didn’t know him, what made him so sure he knew her? She wasn't kind, it wasn't kindness that drove her here. It was selfishness, that was all. The kinder thing would be to have left Fionn alone, from the very first time they met. He said she wasn't bothering him, but she had and she was.

And now he was so very, painfully close. It was miserable. Fionn was saying all kinds of things to her, and she was trying to listen, really she was, but instead she was looking at the shape his mouth made as he did so. Foolish, that's what she was. Her head spun. Her mouth was dry. What was happening?

”Oh--” Don’t, she wanted to say. But don’t what? Don’t pull away, don’t come any closer, don’t say things like that about her? Her blood pounded painfully in her ears, drowning out the sounds of the world beyond this room. Every nerve narrowed in focus until all that remained was Fionn’s hands on her face and her heart trying to batter its way out of her ribs. Somewhere, distant in her mind, an alarm bell was ringing. Be careful, be careful--she had to pull away, to pull back before… She wasn’t sure what. Aurelie knew she was hurtling towards the edge of something she couldn’t see.

Aurelie's mouth fell open, just a little bit. What was she trying to say? She couldn't remember. Something important. I will never be this close to anyone's face again. She really didn't know why Fionn was insisting she couldn't be nice to him, he seemed to have a very strange opinion of himself. There were lots of reasons to be nice to him. Each and every single one of his freckles, for example. Was that absurd? Probably. She felt absurd. But it also seemed true.

Without realizing, Aurelie had moved closer, leaning in as Fionn was pulling back.

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Fionn
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Mon Nov 11, 2019 2:19 am

Loshis 39, 2719 | Midday
Professor Keyes’ Office
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Reluctance. It was why he moved oh so slowly in his retreat really. He could tell himself that he didn’t want to frighten her, that he didn’t want to be this close, didn’t want to leave his hand on her face but it was all lies. ‘Didn’t want’ really meant ‘shouldn’t’ and he knew that damn well. Just as he knew that he didn’t normally get this close to another unless something was going to happen. It was difficult not to imagine something happening when you were that close that your breath was already mingling for a degree, sharing the same air, the same space, your skin tingling with proximity. Did he feel the nearness more intently now that he could feel nexi or bad he always felt this and put it down to something else like a charge in the air? But it was unmistakable now, the non-fields overlapping and mingling, his sense of Aurelie far stronger, far more intense. He couldn’t not notice her. Oh he could look away but there was no way to escape her face, sure to be all too visible even from the corner of his eye. Even if he closed his eyes, he wouldn’t be able to get away from the presence of her, her nexus imprinting details on him, the familiarity of it soaking into him.

Maybe it wasn’t just his own desires and interests that made him reluctant to draw back but that look in her eyes. Her own gaze was surprisingly intense, green eyes huge, her pupils large dark pools within them. The focus of her gaze was hardly discernible, that subtle downwards twitch while he was talking could easily have been his imagination but if he wasn’t mistaken, she was looking at his mouth. And now that Fionn has finished his little beratement, he was all too aware of her own, the way they parted all the more appealing, lips so much redder than most of the men to which he’d been this near. They were fuller as well, a plumpness to them that just made them all the more-

When she was looking at him like that, how could he draw away? His conscience told him that he should, some ounce of good judgment within knew better than to allow himself to be so tempted. But even so, the teenager was searching for some implicit permission, some unspoken consent that yes, he could lean closer and yes, he could indulge his long held curiosity about how it felt to kiss a woman. In theory, it shouldn’t be but there was more than a little of him that wondered if it was different. He’d long wondered as he gazed at full pink mouths moving as they spoke to one another, when those lips pulled up into a smile.

But he did pull away, achingly slowly, his fingers the most reluctant to move and abandon their claim on her face. His hand moved away from her chin, moving a little up her jawline before wiithdrawing, leaving her skin but hovering above it instead of bringing it towards him in case… in case...

His desires had long made him impulsive, seeking gratification where it could be found, snatching moments and opportunities with a desperate eagerness and never thinking of the consequences. There were no such things as consequences in a moment. There was no past or future, only the present. How you got there wasn’t relevant because you’d already arrived, it had no bearing on the here and now as possibility shimmered between two people like this. The future didn’t come, would never come because to hell with the future. If it wasn’t here right now then it had no right to interfere in the present, weighing you down with doubts and uncertainties and questions. And those things could be ignored, slamming a door down on that part of your brain so that it wouldn’t interfere while you allowed yourself to do whatever it was you wanted because you could just regret it later.

There was a reason why Fionn got himself into so much trouble.

But she was moving closer and it made him pause, a small quizzical cock of the head as he confirmed it - she was still moving while he wasn’t. There was a charged moment where doubt flickered through him, a sensible part of him shaking its head: No, don’t. But if she was leaning closer then she was fine with this, right? If she didn’t then she’d be pulling away too.

His fingertips touched her jawbone, tentative and cautious before the decision clicked, anticipation giving way to a surge of adrenaline, rushing through his veins so that thought was slammed into the background and instinct took over. Fingers moved over her cheek, hand cradling the side of her face as he narrowed the gap, turning his head more to the side so he wouldn’t bump noses as he attempted to join their lips, eyes drifting shut.

Assuming she didn’t pull away then she’d discover that Fionn was gentle, surprisingly so as so many others had found. His mouth was only hungry, his kisses greedy when he knew the other, wildness only flooding him when he knew that the interest was firmly reciprocated but he wasn’t certain now and so his lips would be lightly pressed against hers, slow and careful while his blood sang and urged him forward. The young man did have restraint though, enough of his instincts drowned out so that he wasn’t forceful, didn’t drag her to him as he’d done with more enthusiastic partners. Fionn had never considered that it was something he was good at - kissing - but it was something he’d done a great deal. It was something he’d done plenty of times with those who could be classed as friends too; the middle Madden had kissed every friend and ally and enemy that he’d ever had in Brunnhold.

Provided Aurelie didn’t draw back then he’d do so after a few seconds, barely breaking contact so that his lips hovered a fraction of an inch from her own, inviting her to chase his mouth if she wanted more and ready to draw further back if she didn’t, considering the permission - or what he’d taken for permission - withdrawn.
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Aurelie Steerpike
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Mon Nov 11, 2019 4:39 am

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Oh.

Aurelie hadn't been thinking when she leaned in, or at least she hadn't been thinking far enough ahead to consider just what she was encouraging. Perhaps that's why she could do it at all--her head had been removed from the equation. Instead of worrying about what would happen, or not happen, or could happen, she only had room for what was actually happening and might never happen to her again.

Instead of pulling away, she leaned in. Aurelie didn't quite shut her eyes, almost afraid that if she did it would prove to be some kind of delusion when she opened them again. It wasn't that she hadn't been kissed before--she had, several times, experimenting with other girls in the ward. Some of them had been serious about her, but mostly they all just wanted to know--what if? But those experiences had been flat and uninteresting beyond the strange feeling of being close enough to feel someone's breath mingle with your own. This wasn't even remotely the same.

Aurelie's skin lit up when Fionn's fingers brushed against her cheek to come to rest against the side of her head. It exploded into jittery fireworks when their mouths met. Aurelie didn't know how to handle the absurd gentleness of kissing Fionn in this moment. Some tender part of her heart ached, a longing she couldn't identify taking root there and curling around her limbs.

Fine. If we can't be friends, I can at least have this much.

There was a thrumming in her blood that urged her forward when Fionn drew back ever so slightly--she did not think or hesitate, but pressed forward again instead, giddy with greed and not yet thinking about what this would do to her in the future. For once the part of her that doubted her every move was quiet. If Fionn had been careful, Aurelie was not. She felt voracious, uncertainty burned away, for now. For lack of anything better to do with her hands, Aurelie brought them to rest somewhere in the region of the Fionn's waist. Here she did hesitate, touch just light enough to feel the warmth of his body through the fabric of his shirt, but barely enough to put pressure on him.

It was Aurelie who had sought him out a second time, and it was also Aurelie who broke apart again after a few seconds. She struggled to maintain her breath. She felt certain that her heart heart had come to fill all the space where her lungs should be. For a moment she hovered, close enough to Fionn's freckled face that it was clear this was no permission withdrawn--just a pause. If he wanted to continue--if it hadn't been too terrible--she didn't seem to be able to stop herself from responding in kind. An absurd thought occurred to her, and she couldn't bite back a laugh. The sound filled the space between them.

"I think I lied to your sister..."
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Fionn
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Mon Nov 11, 2019 4:39 pm

Loshis 39, 2719 | Midday
Professor Keyes' Office
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He’d wondered about kissing a girl, how different it could be to join lips with one and in many ways, it wasn’t that new. Lips still soft and yielding, the experience still causing the same eager flutter within him sparking the same flame of desire and the same excitement. But there were variations although that was admittedly true of every kiss, every individual different and each one tended to have something distinct about how they did things albeit not quite unique. Aura was different though. Her scent, the plumpness of her lips, the softer angles of her face that fit so readily into his hand. He wanted to explore every inch of her face, tracing the soft freckled skin and the structure of her visage.

But he was good and drew back. Yes, she’d pressed forward to meet him when Fionn kissed her but he still allowed her breathing room, a chance to consider things without that heady rush of contact. It also gave him a chance to see if he could press forward with a bit more keenness, if she wanted him at the moment as much as he wanted her, curious as well as attracted. Even so, the teenager didn’t expect her enthusiasm, the thirst of it as if he was the only source of water in a drought.

He made a sound of surprise, his brows moving upwards, briefly still for a blink of an eye before he responded in kind. His fingers found the back of her neck, the side of his palm still cradling her cheek as he pressed forward, a bit forceful this time, his lips somewhat harder against hers as he tugged her close. Her hands hovered on either side of his waist, featherlight, a ghost of a touch and he enjoyed it, enjoyed every moment of it. He allowed his tongue to flick along her bottom lip, humming appreciatively even as he felt her lean back a little as if to break things off.

He could have pressed on, the middle Madden doubting that the servant girl would protest but he loosened his hold on her instead, growing still so that she knew she could draw away. The youth breathed a little heavily, a near pant as he worked to replenish his air supply. They were still close, the possibility of resuming things definitely on the cards but he was happy to let her catch her breath and give himself a chance to drink the sight of her in.

And then she laughed, the teenager leaning back a tad as he regarded her quizzically, a smirk tilting one side of his mouth. He was momentarily confused, not understanding the joke and then he remembered. Good self-control! He laughed as well, reaching out to tuck some of her hair behind her ear, stroking it to smooth the dishevelment from their kissing session.

”You might have done but really, I think that your self-control is clocking masterful - or close to it anyway. You pulled away after all,” he told her, voice a husky whisper as he ran a knuckle over her cheek. He began to chuckle, grinning broadly as he leaned back on his hand. Fionn gave a little shrug, his laughter stopped although the grin persisted.

”Well, maybe I lied as well. She told me to behave over your head before she left although she didn’t tell me how to behave so… I can’t be blamed, can I? Besides, this is definitely on you, coming here and being so sweet. Let me tell you, my self-control is awful,” Fionn teased, he moved close to her again, licking his lips as he considered her a little more seriously.

”I… I’d never kissed a woman before. I didn’t plan it or anything - obviously - and when Niamh left, I wasn’t going to try to- to- But thank you, I uh… I appreciate it. We aren’t going to be disturbed by the way so uh… we could- I won’t do anything that you don’t want me to do but could we…?” the blond questioned, an eyebrow cocked as he hovered near, scanning her face.

He chuckled a little awkwardly. ”If we are gonna kiss again then it might be a good idea to move to a more... um... comfortable position. I’d hate for you to lose your balance and fall on top of me.”

The smile he flashed her was undeniably cheeky. He was tempted to lead her to her feet, to walk her back into the edge of Keyes’ desk, to let his arms to encircle her waist while he kissed her with feeling. It was a lovely little fantasy frankly but he’d rather have her decide things for herself. He wasn’t going to be the corruptor that he worried he was. His self-control was better than he let on, the young man not wanting to break someone like he’d been broken. Aurelie did have an innocence about her and he didn’t want to ruin her. And he wouldn’t. A kiss was only a kiss, even if it got a bit heated.

Fionn wouldn’t mind a little heat, his heart smacking against the underside of his sternum, eager to have more and yet scared to ask for it. He'd thrown it flippantly at Niamh about screwing Aurelie and while he'd never said that he wouldn't do it, the young man really wouldn't. Not here, not now. Even if she flung herself willingly on the desk for him to- He wouldn't. He wouldn't do that to her. She was a precious thing and he wouldn't disrespect her like that. Not for the sake of his own curiosity or to satisfy some base instinct.

The boy knew better these days. He knew how not to be a monster.
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Aurelie Steerpike
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Mon Nov 11, 2019 7:24 pm

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Her heart fluttered, a bird in the cage of her breast, when Fionn moved to tuck her hair behind her ear. It was a sweet gesture, and she was so unused to sweetness. Something ached in her again, but she ignored it. It didn't matter.

"Someone will have to tell all of your many children," she teased, a little calmer now than she was before. Steadier. She chewed at her lip. The knowledge that Fionn had not kissed a woman before her pleased her. Aurelie was surprised by how much it did so, and not just because that felt like it put them a little more on level footing. Another feeling for the vault--this one, too, seemed dangerous to contemplate. "I--I really didn't come here for--truly, I just meant to give you that thing and leave." Oh, what must he think of her! To go from meeting him to kissing him in less than a month's span... A little of her anxiety returned to her, making her want to chew her nails, pace, anything. Instead, she settled for clasping her hands together in front of her. This is how he had developed such a reputation, she thought. Some kind of undefined magnetic quality that pulled one into his orbit.

Her pulse was still high, nervous energy keeping her afloat. While she hadn't been thinking before, her mind was starting to clear a little now. As funny as she felt being thanked for--for kissing, that had to mean it hadn't been terrible. Which was good, because she certainly hadn't thought so. Quite the opposite, really. They could do it again, even. She wanted to, terribly, even though as they sat awkwardly on the floor the urgency was slipping away from her. The urgency, but not the desire. What a strange thing. And what a strange creature she felt, thinking about it.

"Oh," she breathed. "Oh, I--that would be, that is..." It would be a shame if she--her breath hitched, thinking about it. Until today she hadn't known she had such a vivid imagination. This was quite the learning experience. A nervous laugh escaped her. They were alone, and they would stay alone for a while yet. She didn't want to go. Even if the promise of kissing Fionn again wasn't there, she wouldn't want to go. When she'd said she wanted to know him better, she had really, truly meant it. The girl knew, though she could not have said so, that it wasn't just the shape of him or the arrangement of his features she found pleasing; it was his company, as well, the way he seemed both brittle and sweet at once. Somehow, it seemed just as risky to admit that as what they were just doing.

"I would--uhm. That's, I would very much like to, er, if you... I-I'm not sure when I'll be missed, but..." If Fionn encouraged her even the slightest bit, she would stay. She wanted to stay. Her eyes were wide, pupils dark, but her gaze was steady and unafraid. With only some hesitation, she reached out and carefully, lightly, like she was touching something fragile and rare, skimmed her fingers along the side of his face before letting that same hand come to rest on the side of his neck. "I could stay a while yet..."
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Fionn
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Tue Nov 12, 2019 3:26 am

Loshis 39, 2719 | Midday
Professor Keyes’ Office
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Fionn wasn’t sure if he was nervous or giddy, almost light-headed as he gazed at her, pulse too fast and lips tingling with recent memory. He was certainly excitable, eager to press his mouth to hers again and he was pleased, laughter and smiles coming all too easily to him. But that didn’t mean that he wasn’t a little on edge, a bit uncertain in the face of this newness. He didn’t know how to deal with an encounter like this where there was no clear goal in mind, no understandable endgame. His usual modus operandi wouldn’t work here, the youth in particularly unfamiliar territory. Intimacy was something he’d learned from Lars and there were reasons that he hadn’t slept with the Hessean, which nonetheless caused an undercurrent for frustration for him, even though it had been his own decision. But if it came to it, Lars was a man and he knew his way around a man’s body, understood the sorts of responses he could produce both because he had experience with his own and practice with others. Aurelie was an unknown entity though, even if he did have some technical knowledge from anatomy books he’d had a chance to study. That lack of knowledge made her fragile in his mind, more vulnerable.

Clock the Circle, kissing felt as if it might be a hazardous activity and yet he’d done it anyway because his brain hadn’t been around to offer its opinion at the time, whereas now he knew she wouldn’t break or recoil, and he was just as keen to taste the enthusiasm that she could press upon him. Even if there was some sexual tension rippling between them - maybe he was only imagining it and he certainly couldn’t be feeling it between the nexi, right? - they were talking, teasing and he wasn’t going to interrupt that.

He didn’t seem to be imagining it though, the servant girl trying to find words for something, desire seeming quite present for her but she didn’t seem able to articulate it. There was a pause between the pair, heavy laden with emotion and he had the sense that there was still hesitation from them now, in spite of the eagerness with which they’d fallen on each other before.

And then she brought up the possibility of being missed and an unpleasant wave of reality broke over him.

Work, of course. She didn’t have his sort of freedom and he only had a taste of true freedom at that but it hadn’t occurred to him that she had abandoned work to come see him but if he’d thought about it for a fraction of a second, he’d have realised. The blond felt guilty then, horribly, horribly guilty. He hadn’t wanted her getting into trouble on his account and now here she was flouting oh so many rules just to repay him for using a stolen handkerchief to bandage her hand. And here he was trying to drag her into further trouble. Sure, it wasn’t the ultimate trouble but he had a brain and he should have used it. He’d simply had to avoid kissing her and he’d failed at that. However, under the circumstances, Fionn thought it would have been more difficult to avoid it, that thread of mutual attraction running between them, her eyes drawing him in, inviting him closer so of course he’d been pulled in. He didn’t blame her for that; he’d kissed her first after all so it was his fault.

A frown creased his features, a mix of worry and guilt as he considered her, as he considered how to proceed. The teenager should get her out of here, tell her to return to her work and he’d resume his own. But she’d seemed so upset and bothered by the idea that he might eschew her company and her offer of friendship that he didn’t know how to get her to leave without making her think just that. The scrap didn’t want to hurt Aurelie’s feelings.

”I’m sorry. I should have realised that you were bunking off. I just didn’t think,” he commented, so deeply apologetic, concern in his brown eyes as he bit his lip. But she didn’t seem as concerned as he was, not a bit actually and as her fingers trailed down his face, he found it harder to say no. The touch was delicate, so light that her fingers barely touched him and that made it incredibly sensual. A sound emanated in his throat, small, almost a whimper and he bit his lip harder.

He reached up and took the redhead’s hand, removing it gently while shaking his head gently. No. They shouldn’t. But even as he did it, his pulse was singing - she’d probably felt it beneath her touch - and he didn’t want to let her go, didn’t want to refuse.

Clock the Circle, he was trying to say no but he really didn’t mean it.

”We shouldn’t, Aurelie. I should let you… get back,” he murmured, his hand enveloping hers, wrapping around her fingers so that the back of it was free. Provided that she didn’t pull away, he’d bring it to his mouth, kissing the smooth skin as he continued to look at her over the top of it. Fionn’s eyes were darkened with want, steady on her face before he shifted his knees beneath him, kneeling and then standing, not intending to let go of her hand. Instead of towering over her on the floor though, he had every intention of drawing her to her feet after him.

”We shouldn’t. I shouldn’t. I don’t want you in trouble because of me. You don’t need to take a lashing if they decide it’s serious but…” the teenager whispered, hands moving to gently encircle her waist. ”I do have abysmal self-control.”

And if there was no protest then he’d bend his head to kiss her, gently catching her lips with his own before his mouth pressed more greedily, lips parting with a soft groan.

Fionn could stop whenever he wanted. He could behave himself.

Honest.
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Aurelie Steerpike
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Tue Nov 12, 2019 2:57 pm

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There it was again--Fionn was so quick to claim full responsibility for any consequences. His concern for what might happen to her was sweet, but Aurelie felt a twinge of annoyance underneath. As if she were just a leaf being pulled by the current of his actions.

"You say that as if you're the only one who makes choices, Fionn." Aurelie's tone was firm, but her expression was soft and she gently squeezed the hand that held her own. She was embarrassed, yes, and flustered, and her pulse hammered through her veins with a strength she was sure he could feel. But, oh--didn't his pulse flutter too? She had felt it when he took her hand. Weren't they the same?

This was dangerous, and she should stop. Her shift would miss her, and a Matron would find out--what could she say about where she was? Not to mention that she had to trade favors and information to even get this far--the pieces were easy to assemble for anyone who cared to. Aurelie didn't know what would happen to her if someone did. Alarm bells went off in her head and her heart. But Fionn's hand was warm around her own when he drew her to her feet, and when they moved to her waist she couldn't bring herself to care. All her life she had acted with a fear of consequences. Once, just once, she wanted to act first and let the chips fall where they may.

"I--" Her voice wavered. Aurelie licked her lips and swallowed. She needed--she needed to be sure, and she needed Fionn to know that she was. When she spoke again, her words were breathy and rushed but there was a will and desire behind them. "I want... to stay. Here. With you--if... that's okay."

He leaned in to kiss her again and her hands surged up to catch his face, to pull him closer and act on a hunger she hadn't known she could feel. If he didn't push her back or pull away, she would lean in closer, rising up on the balls of her feet and running her fingers up the back of his neck to tangle through his hair.
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Fionn
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Tue Nov 12, 2019 6:22 pm

Loshis 39, 2719 | Midday
Professor Keyes' Office
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He wasn't the only one to blame in this situation, he knew that. Of course, she knew what she was doing. Even before she opened her mouth to tell him that he wasn't the only one who could make decisions, he could see the certainty in her eyes. She knew what she wanted. Even if he had iron-clad self-control and did his best to hold himself above his desires, Aurelie was obviously more than capable of pursuing him; he didn't need to go pursuing her for trouble to occur. The little knot of worry that had tightened within him, a result of guilt over the responsibility he bore unwound gradually, her affirmation that she wanted to stay with him releasing it entirely.

Fuck the rules. The boy had never had an issue with breaking them before and there had always been consequences, often painful consequences but he'd known what he was doing and he'd accepted the risk of punishment, no, the inevitability of punishment so that he could do what he wanted to do. Fionn could hardly say that he'd corrupted the redhead before him, not in such brief contact. The girl knew her own mind and that evidently involved him right now. He certainly wasn't going to complain, not when it meant that they were on the wavelength, desiring each other and happy to ignore the things that they'd been told since their gating.

Boys and girls weren't supposed to mix. Boys and girls were not supposed to associate and there were so many implications to deceptively innocent words. Oh it might be associate from one overseer, 'be close' from another. Maybe one would suggest that 'touching' was what was disapproved of but they were always euphemisms. You couldn't exist in the Wards for long without learning that sex was the real banned thing and the things that might lead to it but only with the opposite sex. There was honestly nothing dangerous about kissing, it wasn't as if they were going to produce some unhallowed spawn that way but even this... Gods, they'd get into so much trouble for this because of the acts it could lead to but also the feelings that it might help development, the closeness, the problems in the long-term.

They'd always been told no. Neither of the passives were listening. Frankly, it was exasperating listening to all those rules and having to follow them and not being allowed to put a fraction of a toenail out of line. They both knew what they were doing and the potential consequences. Then again, there was also the glaring obvious fact that no one was going to know so where was the risk really.

The blond didn’t know if his companion had had any such thoughts flit through her head and for Fionn, many of them were old ones to be frank. There was some room for thinking when they were in contact but not joined at the lips so it was possible that she thought something in the same timeframe that he did. It was equally possible that she thought nothing at all, letting her passions rule.

And such passions!

When he joined his mouth with hers, her response was ferocious, a fire clearly lit within her with its flames climbing high. Aurelie pressed against him with eager desperation, her desire for him unmistakeable. He didn’t pull away - hells if he would! - but pushed back just as eagerly, such as hungrily, head bent so that he could bridge the height difference between them. Her hands found his face, his neck, his hair and he groaned against her mouth while her fingers tangled in blond locks, pulling him down to her even as she reached higher. He felt her shift in his grasp, felt the tension as she stretched, yearning for him as she drove herself up onto her toes, adding height to her diminutive form.

The force of her desire was a signal to him, clear evidence that she wanted this and every inch of him that she could get her hands on and it implied permission. It was that permission that made his grip tighten, his hold on her waist growing more firm as he tugged her against him, well aware that having her flush against him while his blood pounded and lust and pleasure ran through him was asking for trouble but if she wanted a reaction… she’d get a reaction and he didn’t care that he wouldn’t be able to hide it. There was a very small amount of his brain still capable of higher reasoning rather than pure instinct and it was busy enough. There was a fair part of it occupied in not allowing his hands to roam to certain areas, in spite of his curiosity, in spite of his intense want. Only one hand was left to encircle her waist, looping around her while the other danced up her back, along the tension of her taut spine until it found her neck, her hair, fingers spreading in it. His thumb found her jaw, tilting it up while he drew her nearer, not wanting to lose an inch of her.

It wasn’t an impossible feat despite the difference in their heights but it could be easier. He cracked an eye open so he could see what he was doing and encouraged her towards Keyes’ desk, which wasn’t far away, coaxing her back against its edge. The girl wouldn’t have much say in the matter, hardly able to resist him as he let his second hand drop to her waist for support and lifted up. If he’d let his hands go lower, following the natural curve, he could have lifted her more comfortably but as it was, going up was easily attained and then he leaned forward so that she was perched on the wooden surface, able to wiggle backwards at her leisure to a more comfortable perch.

Once there, he’d allow his lips to linger for a little longer before pulling back, lips moving up and to one side so that they found her cheek.

"I like this staying idea. It’s very good. You don’t have to get in trouble either," Fionn murmured. If she didn’t protest then he’d allow his mouth to move down to her jawline, tracing it softly up to her ear, the heat of his breath gusted in her ear. ”If anyone asks, you were helping Niamh Madden. Can name drop and say she works with Harper Moore. Stop scraps talking, even Matrons,” he admitted, lips moving to her ear. He caught the cartilage at the top between his lips with a chuckle. His hand had found its way to her head again, gently moving hair aside and keeping her close.

Fionn was pleased with that idea, feeling certain that his sister would cover for him and that Harper would be forewarned and therefore forearmed - he assumed at least.

”Do you like this?” he asked huskily. If she still failed to protest then his mouth would go down again, moving from her ear and down her neck, feathery kisses with the occasional flick of tongue.

A thrashing from an overseer was bloody worth it for this!
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Aurelie Steerpike
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: Deeply Awkward Mom Friend
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Wed Nov 13, 2019 2:33 am

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A contented sigh escaped her when Fionn's grip at her waist tightened and he pulled her closer, a small exhalation into the joining of their mouths. This seemed like a lot more than kissing--Aura was fairly certain that there was a degree to which kissing was normally contained, though maybe that was just her tepid experiences speaking. Was she getting out of her depth? Too late for that now, Aurelie. If she had a depth, she’d long since passed it and was being pulled out to the open ocean.

When Fionn steered them both to Professor Keyes’ desk, there was a rational part of her that wanted to laugh. (Another, even more rational part of her, was squeaking a little protest that Fionn worked here--this part she ignored most of all.) Hadn’t she heard enough tawdry stories from breathless teenage girls about just this sort of thing? She hadn’t any interest before--an opinion she was rapidly revising. It certainly was more comfortable a height to be at than standing on her tiptoes just to reach his mouth. And if she got a little thrill from it, well. That was fine too. Probably.

”Hmm,” Aurelie hummed in agreement. This was a good idea. Sort of. Really it was a terrible idea, but it was a terrible idea she was enjoying very much. She was much less sure of his opinion that mentioning his sister would be a golden ticket to save her from whatever trouble might await her--let alone Professor Moore, who was not precisely popular in the Ward. Or that it would do much to help explain her sudden interest in someone who was, as far as rumor was concerned, helping the mad professor abduct other passives for science. If anything, she thought, this likely made it much worse. Fionn seemed overly confident in this regard.

This opinion she kept to herself, in favor of small appreciative noises of everything Fionn was doing with his hands and mouth, reciprocating as best she could. Aurelie was starting to feel her head spin again. He really is terribly good at this. It didn’t quite seem fair--Aurelie didn’t even know what to do with her hands. Absent of a better plan, she let them drift up his sides absently. They wanted to dig in, to go further faster more--but whatever self-control she might have been lacking, she had at least that much.

Did she like it? That seemed a faintly absurd question. Was there some way not to? ”That’s the most ridiculous question I’ve ever heard,” she murmured back. Seized with a sudden embarrassment at her own lack of basis for comparison, Aurelie moved to bury her face in his shoulder. This had the unfortunate side effect of pausing his efforts in the region of her neck, which she had, again, been very much in favor of. It also, again unfortunately, did absolutely nothing to make her less aware of him. Of what she wanted--no, what they both did, and by how much.

”Sorry I--” Was that really her voice? Did she really sound so breathless, so--needy? Even muffled as it was by the fabric of his shirt and the shape of his shoulder, it sounded like the voice of someone else. ”I don’t really, uhm… I don’t know what I’m doing… generally, er.”
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Fionn
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Wed Nov 13, 2019 11:16 am

Loshis 39, 2719 | Midday
Professor Keyes' Office
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It was good, too good if he was honest. This was the sort of thing that would drive him mad later when he remembered it, pining for this sort of contact that was so utterly forbidden. If she’d been a man, it would have been easier because he would have had access and their minders wouldn’t have cared, turning a blind eye as they so often did for these things. However, her sex made that an impossibility, the idea of sneaking off with her, or sneaking between one room or the other entirely out of the question. He’d just be left thinking about this later, reminiscing about the sounds she’d made and wishing. And more than likely frustrated with Jamie for not being a woman so he could be a reasonable diversion.

The sounds she made were lovely and they were a good indication of how she felt about his actions but he still asked her if she liked it. The teenager understood all too well that your body could betray you, wanting contact while your mind said no - in spite of what your mind said. He also knew that you could be coerced through pleasure, your will bent into a more pliable shape. Sometimes it was simply easier to say nothing and allow things to happen, especially if they weren’t entirely terrible. So he asked, of course he asked, because he worried that in spite of her approving noises that she didn’t want this. The last thing Fionn wanted was the young woman to simply go along with things.

Her verbal response drew a chuckle from him, the vibration of it in his throat no doubt felt where it pressed against her own.

”You’d think so,” he responded wryly, pausing to contemplate whether he’d kiss up towards her ear or risk seeing if she’d allow him to move his lips down to the curve of her shoulder to whisper against her collarbone. He paused briefly in that one spot, nipping her lightly as he deliberated, which she might like more or at least be more comfortable with. It was at that point that the young woman shifted away, pressing her face to his shoulder and the youth tensed a tad.

Hm, her answer hadn’t actually been a yes, had it?

Fionn didn’t attempt to move her, didn’t try to open her up for access once more but instead moved his hand to the back of her head, stroking her hair slowly in a gesture that he hoped was soothing. The other arm that had been encircling her waist loosened and the hand moved to gently support the small of her back.

Even as he did his utmost to comfort her, the young man’s insides were churning, worry spiking through him as he wondered what he’d done wrong. Had he done too much? Had he moved too far too fast? Had the move to her neck been the thing that jammed in the spoke of the wheel or had it been earlier than that when he lifted her on the desk? The scrap automatically thought it was his own fault, the weight of experience a burden rather than a boon in this situation. She murmured an apology, her voice strange and he expected the next thing from her mouth to be something along the lines of ‘I can’t do this.’

What she said instead surprised him?

”Oh!” he let out. Damn, could he sound any happier? It was the sense of relief that did it, the fact that he hadn’t crossed a line as he feared he had. Unfortunately, the feeling was short-lived, his experience weighing on him anew. ”Oh…” he repeated, this time far more sombre and yes, there was a touch of worry there.

He hadn’t expected anything from her, the contact and her response to it more than pleasurable enough for him. Fionn didn’t want anything from her except her enjoyment but apparently he’d done too good a job of drawing those responses from her because now she was awkward. Did she feel out of her depth? He couldn’t remember what that felt like - in this type of situation at any rate - but he imagined that it wasn’t a great feeling.

His hands moved to her shoulders, encouraging her to separate herself as he leaned back. He wanted to be able to see her face, ready to tilt it up if she was reluctant to look at him.

”Aurelie, I don’t know what you think I’m expecting but… I’m not expecting anything from you. I don’t want you doing anything you aren’t comfortable with and I don’t want you t-t-to worry. You can do whatever you clocking want with your hands, put them anywhere you like. Well, maybe uh… maybe not anywhere,” the middle Madden explained, his embarrassment at the end clear to see. While his face was somewhat flushed from the excitement of the situation, there was still room for more colour in it, the pink in his features deepening dramatically. The boy swallowed, gaze flicking briefly to the ceiling as if expecting it to provide some form of inspiration.

He wasn’t used to these sorts of conversations, more accustomed to simply doing, his own pleasure incidental and usually fuelled by whatever reactions he could elicit. Very rarely, he would give the occasional quick order under his breath or whoever he was with would get something right but he’d never really talked about it. He’d certainly never told anyone the things that he’d discovered that he liked. If she was implicitly asking him what she should do here… well, he wasn’t at a loss but he was uncharacteristically awkward. Any surety he might have appeared to have just moments before was gone. Especially as he didn’t want this progress too far.

Okay, he certainly desired things to progress as far as they could go but he had no intention of pursuing them. It didn’t mean that there weren’t options, he was just… near loathe to admit them.

”Well, I-I-I liked… your hands in my hair and I-I-I… I wouldn’t ask you to-”

He bit his lip, moving his focus point from the ceiling so he was looking at her once more, something like desperation in his gaze.

Why was it easier to snog her rather than having this conversation? All the words were in his head, all the desires he wanted to ascribe them to bubbling eagerly beneath the surface but expressing them? Damnit, he felt guilty for wanting to express them as if Aurelie would be put upon! And the words that did bubble up felt so… so childish! The simplicity of them painful for him to hear. ‘I like’ was such a childish phrase to preface things with when you kept repeating it.

”I like having lips on my collarbone a-a-and I like… I like the feel of skin... to skin, hands under my shirt o-o-or…” he stuttered awfully, crimson.

Part of him realised, and was terrified at the prospect, that if she did the latter then she’d feel the scars on his back, the ridges of where switches had bitten into him over the years, some better healed than others. But you could feel those through the fabric, although it wasn’t the same as skin to skin. And much of it was raw, the most recent lashing he’d received after the incident in the kitchen while not too severe having reopened old wounds and she’d feel that. She’d guess, even though it was far better than it had been and then…

Clock the Circle, look at the effort she’d gone to over a handkerchief! What would she do if she realised that he’d suffered for his actions the last day they’d met?

”You d-d-don’t have to- I wouldn’t expect you to- Aurelie, I-”

Fionn didn’t even know what he was saying, one set of fingers running through his hair while the others gripped the edge of the desk.

In all honesty, he wasn’t sure if he wanted her to do what he liked or if he was terrified that she would.
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